Quicksilver

I don't know what to say; maybe I've forgotten how to say it. Today is the first day I've actually had to myself, off from work, since mid-July. Wow. It hasn't felt that long though--days stretch and coalesce until they form one undulating mess that is time. I guess time is quicksilver.

Faith with Deeds Stinks Sometimes

Well I am back in VA--long drive, numb butt, but I'm back. It's been a huge kick in the stomach being back here--I am always blown away by how uninterested and almost hostile my family is to my walk with Christ. But what has been most difficult and testing is the call to move to Rochester. I am excited to move, but it requires me to leave a job I just got that pays well and promises growth for years to come, in a field I love. I don't really like the job, but i love the organization, their purpose, and where it could take me. However, i feel called to leave it, so this afternoon i'm giving them my two weeks. I just started. they are training me to take another woman's place who is retiring in two months. Ugh. I am excited and terrified--this is the biggest outward test of my faith so far. I know God has something awesome for me down the road, it's just hard to see it in the context of right now--it's not logical what he's calling me to do, and i'm a fairly logical person in my decision making. Part of me says it couldn't possibly be God, that it's the most foolish thing i'll ever do, but the rest of me just knows. I mean, why Rochester? I don't honestly know--it's the same feeling I got when I was called to go to school in Syr and called to go on summer staff--two experiences that changed my life radically. I worry about money, about expenses, about defeat, about my pride--I need to just suck it up, pray for strength and do it, but I'm feeling kind of alone right now. ahhhh!