The last month and a half of 2007 has slurred into 2008 without so much as a wink or a nod. Within the fury every week seemed to have some sort of festival, party, concert, wedding or other event requiring attendance and alcohol and each morning after brought the same promises of exemption and remorse, like my 19 year-old self woke from the slumber of time to rage again. I thought she was long gone. I was wrong.
I don't pretend to be changed. I only hope I have.
I think there is this subtle self-destructive fiber in my being that awakens without impunity or regard and tears through the careful structure that has formed around me as if good decision-making was nothing but balsa wood and chaos something akin to a tornado. This fiber is stronger than I care to admit, and her influence is far-reaching. She is the beast inside me and she rages at her whim.
I am happy to see 2007 go...God am I happy to see it leave. It was one of the better years in this decade, but I am still glad to see it fade into history. My hopes for 2008 involve stability, a sense of community, and the ever-elusive idea of putting down roots. I think this town is my home for an indefinite time period; just what that entails and where that takes me (in all aspects) is what will be unfurled within the winds of the year.
How's that for a post of mixed metaphors.
1 comment:
AMEN.
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