Captain Hook

So...update on the handywoman status:
Phase I: Back bathroom
Ripped out the old vinyl tiles (which I've been "accidentally" calling vile tynils) which only took, oh, a day and a half. I thought my left arm would fall off. Note: I am a lefty.
(But then Margarita, Katie and I went to The Town Pump in Black Mountain to see my friend's band and Margarita got hit on by townies and we got spicy baconators from Wendys and it made my arm feel so much better)
All the ripping out of tiles also took the skin off my pinky knuckle on my right hand, and I manged to hammer my hand a dozen times or so on my index knuckle, so my right hand looks like I got in a fistfight with broken glass. Awesome.
Day two found me finishing the ripping out of the tiles of death, vacuuming water out of a toilet (literally...it's why God invented shop vacs) and dragging the toilet into the living room. To quote Katie: "The TV is right here, here's the toilet and the couch...the kitchen is right there...I may never leave this room."
I then hand scrubbed the floor with Goo Gone to try to rid it of the skicky, which only partially worked. Then came the measuring and laying of the new tiles. And the cutting of the new tiles.
Cutting vinyl tiles requires a special hook-shaped razorblade that can be inserted into a regular carpet-cutter. It's a really bad idea waiting to happen. All the cutting took the skin off my middle finger's knuckle from dragging it across tiles, so I'd have to wipe the tiles off after I cut them cuz they'd be a little bloody. Don't worry, I'm clean.
On the very last tile, at 10:30 last night, I managed to put that MFing hook into the fatty part of my right thumb, on my palm. It's not a horrible injury, but it was bleeding pretty fast and hard and for a while I couldn't tell the extent of the damage (it's a puncture wound about 1/2" long but fairly deep) Jane came running with a towel and bravely finished cutting that last tile.
We didn't have any medical tape, so til this morning my bandage was some gauze and duct tape.
Is it sad to say that I'm sort of happy to be at my inside boring job today, just to rest up from the physical labor?