Scary But True

I may have developed the keen ability to sleep dial. Not drunk dial, sleep dial. Like pick up my cell phone and call someone in my sleep. Cuz I did it. At 6:30 this morning. To my friend Seth. And I didn't know until I woke up to a text from him asking why I called.
Uh oh. This is not good.
It's not like he was even on my "recent calls" list, like my sleepy self had to actually LOOK HIM UP in my phonebook. He's not the first S, or even the first SE. I must have been intentional about this freaking call.
I mean I talk in my sleep, this I know. I talk in my sleep all the time, I burst out laughing, I have slept walked only once, but this....new level of creepy.
So if your phone rings and it's some ungodly hour and it's me calling then either something bad has happened or I'm sound asleep and I'm a jackass.

State of the Union

• Windy Gap offered me an extension so that I won't get and ulcer and I can get a *$(*&# job between now and the end of September. For this Windy Gap gets a big old sloppy kiss. Jenny Moffatt in particular. It's a metaphorical kiss Jenny, don't you worry. *$(*&# job could possibly get a knee to the groin or its own sloppy kiss depending on the outcome. Did you hear that, *$(*&# job? Yeah, the choice is yours.

• For a whole year I've been giggling at the fact that the company that makes the latches on several of the bathroom stalls at WG is called “HINEY HIDERS.” Yeah, you giggled too, didn't you?

• I talked to my sister yesterday, and by talked I mean for 38 minutes I listened to her talk to her three children while I watched my cell minutes rack up. We are so close in age, yet on such completely different planets. I wish we'd be at the same place again; I miss her.

• Today Caroline McGlade turns 30. Don't worry though, as long as she giggles at fart noises and makes up ridiculous songs, she's still a youngin'. With a nick-nack paddy whack.

• Last weekend Beth and Grafton were in town for their first anniversary and I realized the best way to show people Asheville is to have them eat their weight in as many kinds of food as possible. New Asheville slogan: “Weird Town, Now Shut Up and Go Eat There.” Also: Mimosas at Early Girl Eatery: Choice my friend. Choice.

• Speaking of Asheville, for Camden's birthday last week we had a party at the Skybar, a new spot in the Flat Iron building that is basically just martinis on their fire escape but it's on the 8^th floor and they have an elevator operator and a pretty view of the Grove Arcade and the sunset, so well done, Skybar. “This drink is the same price as 10 PBRs.”--Robin, always keeping it in perspective.

• I ran the lake zip yesterday and in two hours I had a total of 5 sets of rides. It was a chance to sit in quiet and pray and I needed it so badly. I love that I needed it; that's a change for me.

• Kelly Willis is coming to the Grey Eagle on September 27th, Erin McKeown is coming October 13th, and “Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me” is coming to the Diane Wortham Theatre on November 15th. Who's in?

• My iPod managed to erase itself randomly and at first I was really annoyed but now I'm sort of enjoying the fresh start of playlists and songs. An unwelcome clean slate but a clean slate nonetheless.

• I'm not sleeping again. I wake up five or six times a night; my mind won't shut up. That or I have to pee, but that's just cuz of my bum prostate.

• Trivia team names: Teen Wolf Blitzer or "Miss South Carolina Geography Squad"