No Fries With That Baggage

Yesterday I got what some would call a one-two punch of emotion, and poor Liz got the brunt of my reaction to it...Well her and Mr. Sam Adams. It's amazing how much emotional and physical can coincide--how emotional illness can manifest itself in the literal pains. My head was spinning--the wind got knocked out of my heart and head--amazing.
I was in the midst of feeling sorry for myself when I called my dear friend Elena today and found her life to be much, much more entangled than mine (it's ok though, because as Hatcher says, "She has great hair.") and suddenly my problems took a backseat. Elena is one of those friends that I would do almost anything for--like I have no problem traveling great distances or doing impossible tasks just to be with her, to make her life easier. It's automatic, and I say that much more as a tribute to my instincts as to my heart. What makes this better is both my father and my stepmom agree, so the whole household would do pretty much anything to keep her warm and safe. She has the biggest fan base of any of my friends. I'm the president of her fan club; dues are $10/year if you want to join.
So without much thought I bought two bottles of red and met Elena, Chad and Chuck at my house for some reprieve and company. (And comfort cheese!) There is no greater privilege I can think of than to be there for my friends, and I say that as sincerely as possible. Again, I had an unexpected kick to the gut yesterday that I don't particularly want to discuss, a kick I wish never existed.

I feel the culmination of an uncertainity is brewing; one I have little power over. I so know what answer I want, and I have had to literally ask my girlfriends be pessimists for me in this regard, in deference to the onslaught of girly emotion that occurs when the word "future" is closely implied with the idea of "commitment". I think I now have indigestion.
These past few days have brought too many thoughts and too much work, I'll get to you when I can. I haven't forgotten I'm just wicked busy.