Unfriending

A Facebook 'friend' (I always use that term loosely, for I have several people on Facebook that I've only met once or twice in real life) posted this article the other day, and since then I haven't stopped thinking about it.

Female Friendship: Ack, My Friend Dumped Me

It's about being dumped by a friend, something I think most people have experienced at least once in their life. I know I've been dumped before, and I've done the dumping. 

I don't suppose it's ever easy, fun or clear cut. I don't think I've had a friendship break up over a specific fight, or one that ended with a conversation about why it should end. It's been the quiet distancing that does it. The unreturned calls or emails, the invitations that go unanswered, the life that gets in the way of a friendship. Resentments that start as itches and become deep wounds. 

And sometimes I wish there was an exit interview for friendships, a way to find out what I did wrong so I won't do it again, or I can work to repair it. But there never is an exit interview, is there? Things just end. 

In the age of social media, we have the 'unfriending' process, as if disconnecting with someone online is the same as it happening in real life, like those bonds don't still continue even if we no longer care to acknowledge them. What a strange idea, to unfriend. It makes the process of disconnection sound so clear cut. It rarely is.