Enjoy The Veal

Now a guest post from my dear friend Lizzie, who sent me this email as a fake live journal. I shall make all her dreams come true by posting it here:

i am at the library and feel like i want to spit stuff out, but am too lazy/not up for the task of creating a livejournal at the moment for the following reasons:
-should be working on paper
-feel fat
-i hate this paper
-don't have the energy for
-worrying about censoring b/c am in minstry so therefore am an example
-making a name that is clever without appearing to be trying too hard
-nothing clever coming to mind that isn't grotesquely annoying or unoriginal
-examples: nothingclever, an american in london (for future references...that's probably the low point when i realized i was not worthy of a livejournal)

ok, so i was looking into buying a syracuse is oranges shirt b/c in the last year or so i've had more cuse pride than ever in my life. guess it's b/c i'm leaving it. anyways, got looking at joe cassera's website through it and looked at the pics of his girlfriend. i'm sorry if this is getting personal, i just need to vent. it's nothing personal about him, i mean, personally, i don't really know him, seems like a nice guy, am using him to represent all species similar to himself. i know his last 3 girlfriends, before this last one. like, know them well in respects to this one boy they all have in common. the poor girl in the middle i think was a rebound. he hasn't spoken to the first one, who has been engaged since the spring, the last one broke up with him after kissing another boy while she was studying abroad in spain (kudos to kissing in spain...not the infidelity). so there's a little background...here's my beef: Don't people get tired??? Jumping boyfriend to boyfriend, girlfriend to girlfriend. each relationship seems to be just as deep and interesting and passionate as the previous. doesn't their back hurt from the baggage, from having an entire freaking uhaul attached to their butt? do people not see or not care? given, all very attractive people. but what?! do they have chocolate flavored lips and a strawberry tongue? (disclaimer: if they really do, sign me up. also, this whole email is negated b/c that's pretty effin cool and i'd want to use it if i were them too...especially if i could only taste it while other people were. well, i guess you could get sick of it...many flaws....must invest further thought...)

so yeah....that's the thing. does girl #4 feel special? i'm talking #4 serious since college. i'm talking full name (including middle...which annoys me anyways, therefore i will be more harsh) and big color pictures on one's website devoted entirely to this #4. is there something to be said about a person who is never single? what about a person who is always single? can i turn this in instead of my paper? i think i might try.is the big photo mantage necessary? is it a proclamation of affection or merely a tool to bite the thumb at the ex? i mean, how do people get over the past relationship so fast? i don't think they do. it's gotta build up, hence the uhaul. i'm thinking eventually it will no longer be a trailor, but an actual truck that they just drive around in before they know it. lucky that orange is so hot right now. by then is it too late? i think it would need some serious thinking. like, i totally thought i was over eric quickly, but i know if i had dated anyone this summer, it would have totally been bogus (like his rebound....sucka). i have/had more thoughts, but since my head is generally cloudy (i did grow up in syracuse....just thought of that, analogy makes me happy) i have lost most of it.
thanks for coming, enjoy the veal.
(i know, very unoriginal....especially convicted since am studying cezanne and stein currently)

current mood: annoyed
current music: norah jones radio on norahjones.com...discovery of the
week